Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
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