Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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