You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
