You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
