I think i peed on brittanys purse
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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