So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
