im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
