I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Randomize
