I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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