i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
