addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
