i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
