She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
