The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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