are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
