i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
