walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I love you. Go after that dick
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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