So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize