I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
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