i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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