it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
