Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
