please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
