And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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