After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
