I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
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