Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
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