he puts the penis in happiness.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
