Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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