You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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