whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
