sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
Randomize
