Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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