Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
