I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Randomize
