Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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