ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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