I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize