...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
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