I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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