Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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