I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Randomize
