Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
