Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
The dick lei will go down in squad history
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
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