im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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