Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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