We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize