5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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