I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
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