People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize